giving thanks

primary, originally uploaded to the brenneman photo set.

The first Thanksgiving I ever had was in an old underwear factory.

We were living in my studio which was in one end of this massive space. We had all we needed in this our first home we had a shared kitchen which housed a table that would seat 20. We had some wonderful times in this place - a Star Trek how to host a murder party, our first Halloween together, a 40th birthday for a friend where the place was lit up with 50 candles on candelabras and glitter on the floor. We would latter use the candelabras for our wedding.

I have fond memories of this place and sad ones too where I was trying to feel grown up, struggling to make ends meet but feeling the love of the man I choose to be with. For this I decided to take on some of his traditions and Thanksgiving was one of them.

We began a ritual of inviting the people closest to us and giving them a recipe to make and bring along. Lots of variety there: We have had some strange spoon bread made by our dear friends who are now residing in the US (we were all a little hesitant to even eat it), beautiful pumpkin pies, wonderful candied yams, and even the occasional coconut cream pie!

One friend always brings a big pot of garlic mash potato, we all look forward to this, in fact if she is late we just wait. We have had some neighbours come and go, this year we missed our end-of-the street neighbours, they are travelling abroad, we invited our recently-moved-out neighbours, who are pining for their old street and all of us.

I always invite family too, but I think I have never managed to ever have them all here. Even one here makes me happy.

Every Thanksgiving I used to always know where my mother in law would be, there would be a phone call a week before where she'd let us know who she would be spending it with. Special occasions like Thanksgiving make me miss those calls, she hasn't been with us for almost two years.

This year I made cornbread in her cast iron skillet, I laid out her linen cross-stitched table cloth, surely made by her also dearly departed sister. I made Haystacks for Aaron from his Mom's recipes. This is how we choose to remember her by using the things her hands would have touched hundreds of times.

I thought too of my Father-in-law whom passed away this year, I thought of how thankful I was that he meet three of my children when last we were over there. I know how much it means now to Aaron to hold your family dear. I am thankful to be here for my partner to have had four beautiful children together, I am thankful for the memories.